For The Man.... an oldie but goodie

Years ago, I took a Creative Writing class. The assignment was to write on something that changed our lives or made us who we are. This started off as a somewhat angry writing. It describes the hurt that I have felt from different men throughout my life. Each statement of "For The Man" does not represent a different man. Many men brought along many of the feelings brought out in this piece. But the one thing I recognized at the end is that, in spite of all the hurt and pain I have gone through in my life, I still believe in love. I still believe in good men. I still believe in happiness because I see it in my life every single day.

I'm sharing this piece because I know so many women have gone through similar things and have become bitter. Don't let another person steal your happiness. Create your happiness on your own.  Enjoy.

For the man in my life who has treated me like shit, who has walked all over me, and who I've allowed to walk all over me… for the man who felt like the only thing I was good for was ass, lunch, some money, a drink, or dinner….for the man who wanted me to be the woman on the side and didn't expect to be the man on the side--the woman who was played with, the woman who loved him but wasn't good enough, the woman who spoiled him, took care of him, treated him like a king, but had kids so he couldn't be bothered with; the woman who treated him with the utmost respect, but he dogged on a regular; for the man who wanted me to be the woman for the day but not for a lifetime; the woman who stood by his side when the going got tough, but he disappeared when it got good; for the man who said he loved me, who even said he was in love with me, but couldn't allow himself to be with me; for the man who dated me, then dumped me because someone else came along with more to offer—money, sex, time--but love; for the man who showed me nothing but his ass, his limp dicks, and his 2 minute lays; for the man who thought he was doing something in bed but really wasn't; for the man who really was doing something in bed, but that's all he could offer; for the man who has non-affectionate, non-emotional, uncaring, selfish, cheating, lying, doggish behaviors; for the man who I loved who didn't love me back; for the man my kids loved who didn't love them back... 

For the man who came into my life to only add heartbreak and nothing else; for the man who got me pregnant, doubted it was his, disappeared to let me deal with it alone, and tried to come back around for more; for the man who has put me down, called me names, put his hands on me, and made me feel lower than the ground itself; for the man who seems to think he's God's gift to earth; who because he has money, he can treat me like shit; for the man who would rather be with someone for what they have than for what they have to offer; for the man who has promised my daughters the world, but only given them hell; for the man who even my daughters don't want in my life; for the man who yelled at me and hurt me in front of my daughters and completely disrespected me; for the man who has made me out to be a bad person; for the man who has tried to diminish my self-esteem; for the man who swore I was cheating on him when I swore I wasn't—for the man I really was cheating on because I knew he was too and for the man I really wasn't cheating on because of my love for him; for the man who only called me at midnight for a bootie call; for the man who laid next to me and told me of his dreams, and his goals, and his love, then turned around and told someone else the next night; for the man who tried to rape me and failed; and for the man who tried and succeeded...

For the man who put his hands around my throat to choke my last breath; for the man who has hurt me with his words; for the man who humiliated me in private and embarrassed me in public; for the man who loved me in secret and ridiculed me in the open; for the man who didn't have room for me in his life; for the man who walked in front of me instead of beside me; for the man who couldn't see past the bad in me and see the good; for the man who thought he could buy me but all I wanted was his heart; for the man who didn't respect me; for the man who believed I didn't deserve the best; for the man who didn't give me his best; for the man who made me the mat for him to walk on, stomp mud on, and lay on; for the man who has added another scar to my heart, another scar to my mind, another scar to my body; for the man who I would have done anything for…for the man who I still would do anything for…for the man who I still love today who doesn't deserve to be loved by a dog.....

I thank God for allowing me to grow from the hurt, heartache and pain you put me through. 

I'm still standing...

I'm still surviving...

I'm still loving with all my heart.