I am Tired…..

I am tired of playing with myself. I am tired of being left alone… to my own devices… horny… wet… bothered… frustrated… wanting… yearning… craving…but yet and still, nothing.

I am tired of playing with myself. Tired of feeling the throb between my legs… feeling wetness for no known reason, but a thought in my head, a text that brought a smile, a voice over the phone…a writing. I am tired of trying to control the urge to respond immediately to the feeling…that urge. Tired of trying to squeeze my thighs together, rub my legs back and forth, stand up, move around, re-focus my thoughts and pray for the well to dry up so I can continue with my day.

Tired of giving in. Tired of that first touch of my finger to my yoni. That first chill that runs through my body, letting me know I’m alive and sexual and my body feels amazing. Tired of that clit to fingertip tease; that tickle of the most sensitive spot on my body. Tired of feeling my own wetness…my own cascades. I am tired of that first finger sliding into heat and moisture and tightness and that sigh that sneaks past my lips as my body relaxes. I am tired of that arch my back makes and my finger slides deeper into me, imagining thickness…blackness…deepness…maleness.

I am tired of stroking my yoni slowly. Sliding my finger across my lips, pulling them, rubbing them, spanking them. Tired of rubbing my thumb over my pleasure spot while fingers move their way inside me. Tired of the slow glide of my index finger from the top of my yoni down to the deep dark hole. I am tired of one finger turning into two… turning into three. Tired of my fingers being flooded with my orgasmic outbursts.  I am tired of two fingers reaching up, pleasing that textured area and producing waterfalls… I am tired of squeezing my nipples, pulling at them, feeling orgasmic waves through them; tired of feeling my body convulse under the power of my own fingers; the magic of my own touch; the sensuality of my own being.

I am tired of slow fingering. Fast fingering. Deep fingering. Shallow fingering. Patting. Rubbing. Fondling. Climaxing. Tickling. Teasing. Stroking.

I am tired of that strong orgasm. That last exhale into euphoria. Tired of jerking torsos and shaking legs and racing heartbeats. I am tired of that surge of energy that moves through my entire body and forms an expression of sheer pleasure over my face. I am tired of that calm. That sense of peace before I close my eyes and bask in the aftermath. I am tired of that honeyed taste of my juices on my fingers as I suck on each one. Tired of that longing for him instead of my enchanted hands. My toy that never dies. My climax without words or sound.

I am tired of playing with myself.