The Prequel to Goodbye....

It’s been a minute since I blogged. I have been going through so many emotions and feeling so confused as to how much I want to share and how much is necessary to share. I have always felt as if I have been a very open person, one who is able to express myself pretty clearly for the most part. I don’t really try to hold back on my posts, but when they begin to include other people, it makes things a little harder to be as open and honest about them. I am going to share eventually, because as I share, I release. I let go. I move forward.

I am not a hurtful person. I try my best to not hurt feelings or hurt people in any way. But when you put up with shit for so long and you hold feelings in for so long, and you listen to lies as they relate to you and your relationship with people, eventually, you have to let it go or you will explode. I am disgusted by how people can speak with such sincerity, but in reality, be a complete fraud. At the same time, I am tired of people claiming to be friends, loves, etc. purposely hurting me. So why am I afraid to share my true feelings? Why should I be worried about hurting someone who doesn't feel anything about hurting me? These are thoughts I am working out within myself. 

So as I continue to write out my feelings in another piece, I am writing this just to give a warning, if you wanna call it that.

I have released some people out of my life. Friends who were only friends because they wanted to be nosey. A man who lives a life completely opposite of who he claims to be. Associates who associated only because they wanted what I had. It is time to part ways and move forward because I do not have the energy to deal with theirs anymore. I have been surrounded by energy vampires for way too long now. I have felt drained and tired and uneasy for way too long and it is…. Rather, it has been time for me to say my goodbyes.

Never hold back your words. Never hold back your thoughts that are tearing you apart inside. The longer you do that, the more they will eat away at you and cause damage to your spirit and your body. It’s time to release. It’s time to clear out.

Speak freely. Speak honestly.