Random Thoughts of Frustration.....
I’m feeling some kinda way tonite. Anger, frustration, hurt,
numb….. all these mixed emotions constantly being stirred around within me. I
don’t get this whole damn concept of people playing games as adults. I don’t
get the stupidity around people saying one thing and doing something completely
different. Of people not being able to share their feelings, express their
concerns, communicate with each other without being on a damn text or FB. What
happened to being able to speak to each other face to face, or at least over
the phone? When did checking on your girl become ok by sending a text message every few days or breaking up with
your dude on FB chat?
I don’t get men. I don’t get the way they think and I know I
probably never will, but I do know that the shit they do at times is completely
ridiculous. I know men will be quick to say, women do the same thing, and
believe me, I’m sure you are absolutely right about that, but I can’t speak for
women right now, because guess what? I am one! So I speak on what I know, and
what I know is men need to grow up and deal with shit instead of trying to
ignore it. When there is a problem that needs to be resolved, how about doing just
that? How about finding a resolution with someone instead of acting like
nothing happened or nothing is wrong? What is this idea that there needs to be
distance when something is wrong because distance makes everything better??
Where did men come up with this foolishness!!! My ex used to do that a lot.
When he knew I was mad, he would just ignore me for a few days, but in the few
days, my anger grew stronger and by the time we did speak, I was ready to
explode.
I have always been a communicator. I can talk about
everything under the sun and I can share my opinions and thoughts and I can
definitely ask a million and one questions. It’s the journalist in me, I guess,
I don’t know. But I am constantly battling trying to get communication from
other people and it’s hella frustrating. Folks can write long ass posts and comments on FB, talk non-stop about b.s., tell jokes, shoot the
shit, but when it comes to real stuff, it all goes haywire and becomes null and
void…
People show you who they are every moment of the day. They
show you if they are worthy of being in your life. They show you if they even
want to honestly be in your life. And they show you if they have no purpose in
your life as well. People who want to be a part of your life take the time to
show you just that. They reach out to you. They communicate with you. They
check on you. They acknowledge when you’re hurting or down or happy or
uncomfortable. They are a friend. Isn’t that what you would do if you cared
about someone? Or has everyone decided to live on their own island without
acknowledging anyone or anything else but themselves? Is that what we’ve come
to? Because if that is the way it’s going, I obviously have to start thinking completely
different.
All in all, I just wish a man would be a man. Please don’t
say you’re a man, a leader, an Alpha male, a communicator, a friend, a
confidant and act like a child when shit gets hard. Women need strong men. We
need to know that when we are ready to crumble, someone is there to help
us back up and give us support, as we do for them. We need to know that someone
has our back, someone will protect us and comfort us and hold us when we need
to feel secure.
Women can’t do this alone. We can’t survive without men and
vice versa. But we can’t survive with men who are unfit, unavailable, irresponsible
and clueless. When men become the
amazing Kings they are meant to be (because Lawd knows not every man is a
KING), a woman will do anything in the world for him. Is that really too much
to ask?
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